British R&B group Soul II Soul had a great song back in the early 90's called "Back To Life" (the lyrics went, "Back to life, back to reality, back to the hear and now"). Hmm, great song. I'm listening to it right now, while I type this, because the words are very fitting for my life right now.
Don't worry, I'm not going all the way back to how my life was before the start of "Dream Month". I'm not applying for any full-time office jobs right now, but I am starting to get back to work. I visited a temp agency on Monday called Trak Services. I worked with them when I first moved back to DC in 2012, and I got my previous office job through them. They're great.
So I visited Trak Services on Monday morning and spoke with my rep about what kinds of jobs I'm looking for. I told them that I'm only interested in temporary jobs, just a few days a week (but I'm also willing to work occasional week-long jobs). I told them that I'm pursuing a freelance lifestyle so that I will always have time to work on my creative projects. I said that I was looking for short-term gigs at conferences, reception, admin, data-entry, etc.
The only thing I needed was a black pant suit. Ugh. A lot of the conference jobs require a black suit and white button-up shirt. I told my rep that I would go out a buy a suit that day. Ugh.
I don't own a black pant suit. Let me be more specific. I don't own one that FITS me anymore (my waist-line declared war on my body two years ago and is continuing to annex more and more land mass). And, as I have mentioned in previous blogs, I HATE SHOPPING!!! These things ALWAYS end in tears. But if I want to be able to work temporary jobs, I have to own one black suit.
My first attempt to buy a suit was right after my Monday morning meeting at Trak. I told them I would buy a suit immediately, so I walked out of that office and immediately started to look for women's clothing stores. I soon found an Ann Taylor shop on Connecticut Ave. NW, south of Dupont Circle. No one came over and asked me if I needed help, so I walked around the shop by myself. I didn't see ANY clothing in a size 14 (and let's be honest, even 14 is a little tight these days), so I got frustrated, and I left.
Later that night, my roommate Marguerite asked me how my day went. I told her about the soul-crushing attempt to buy a suit. She empathized and agreed that the clothing industry does NOT make it easy for women to buy...well, anything. We all come in different shapes and sizes. She recommended that I try the big department stores at the mall at Pentagon City. So I agreed to do that in the morning.
The next day (Tuesday, of this week), I took the Yellow Line train to Pentagon City, bright and early (I've lived in DC off-and-on since 2008, and this was my first time EVER at the mall at Pentagon City, but that's really just because I hate malls so much). I made the mistake of walking into an Express store first. Ugh. No one there to help, and no sizes bigger than a size 8. Another fail.
I then walked into a Nordstrom's. It took me ages to locate the women's suits part of the store. But I found it. I was already defeated and on the verge of tears when a sweet blond girl named Jill asked me if I needed any help. I said, "I really do. I have to buy a suit for work, but I've already tried two other stores, and no one has my size, and I'm huge, and I'm about to start crying again." She was kind and attentive and offered to help pick out some different suits for me.
After about 45 minutes of taking clothes off and putting clothes on, I eventually found a jacket, shirt, and pair of pants that fit! It all needed to be altered (the pants were about a foot longer than my own legs), but it all got around my hips, my waist, and my broad torso. I was ecstatic! But not about the price. Ugh.
The white blouse was $74, the black pants were $248, and the black jacket was $448. The alternations were $17. For a crushing grand total of $833.20. Ugggghhhhhhhhh. But I bought it! I bought it because I hate shopping. I bought it because Jill, the sales lady, was so sweet and helpful! I bought it because I wanted the whole ordeal to be over with. I bought it because I couldn't handle walking into anymore gosh-darn clothing stores. So I bought it.
All I could think was, "I'm going to have to work a hell of a lot of temp jobs to pay for this damn suit. I thought about the fact that the damn suit cost almost as much as a month of rent. I thought, "Is it even worth it?" But I need a suit. I will need that stupid black suit for every temp job that I will ever have, ever again. I will use that suit for substitute-teaching jobs. I will even use that suit when I go on my book tour.
I bought that suit because I believe, deep down, that I will be able to afford that suit one day. One day, I will pay-off my $19,000 in student loans with a single check. One day, my publisher will hand me a check for $100,000, and I will laugh to myself about how much I once freaked-out about buying a damn suit. I will laugh because I will realize that that $100,000-check would not have been possible if I hadn't taken a leap of faith one day and decided to quit my job in an effort to be a writer, once and for all. One day it will all have been worth it, and I will laugh.
I'm going to the hair salon this afternoon. Along with my $800 suit (gulp!), I've also decided to tidy-up my hair a bit, now that I'm heading back into the job market. I have...some grey hairs, you may or may not know, and I need to go to the salon and have them covered up. And while my friend Ted really wants to see me dye all of my hair grey, I'm just not ready to take that step. I think I'm a cute brunette. And I like getting the occasional red or blond highlights. I'm not ready to give-up on my brown hair quite yet. So off to the salon I go, to spend more hundreds of dollars that I don't have. Ha!
Let me wrap this up with a bit of good news about my present situation. While I was at the Mall at Pentagon City on Tuesday, I popped into the Apple Store to say hello to my dear friend, Landon, co-creator of Church Night. Landon was just about to embark on his 15-minute break, so my timing was perfect. We walked to a coffee kiosk and Landon bought me an iced coffee (I had been sweating from the moment I stepped foot inside of that Nordstrom's, and I hadn't stopped sweating, even after I left).
Landon asked me if I would be willing and able to come work for Church Night as a production assistant (PA). I had been a PA for a Church Night film shoot a couple months ago, and Landon and Linsay (the other co-creator of Church Night) thought I'd be a perfect PA for the actual nights of the show. I told Landon that I would be HONORED and DELIGHTED to work for Church Night, in any capacity that they needed me.
So, ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to announce that I have my first freelance job!!! I'm going to be working for Church Night!!! And I don't even need that damn suit!!!!
"It's all happening." (Below is a clip from the movie Almost Famous, where the characters use that line...sorry for everyone reading this on a mobile device who can't watch this clip below because of the Flash player).
It's all happening.
Love and happiness to all of you, my friends.
~Leila
P.S. All your favorite episodes of the Sherman House Webisodes are always available to stream at www.shwebisodes.com!
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